At the summit of Thailand’s highest peak, Doi Inthanon, surrounded by old friends and new companions, an unexpected conversation unfolded under the stars. A newly made friend, curious about my journey through cancer, asked how I had managed to navigate the turbulent waters. After a moment’s reflection, I replied, “With courage, acceptance, and gratitude.” That journey later became a book, but in that moment under the stars, it distilled down to those three essential elements.
The Freedom Paradox
This exchange sparked a deeper discussion about his own search for meaning. Like many who achieve financial independence, he had reached what many consider the promised land – complete freedom of choice, largely unburdened by monetary constraints. Yet this liberation brought with it an unexpected challenge: the struggle to find purpose when traditional motivators fell away.
It’s a paradox rarely discussed in our success-driven world. When financial security is achieved and the daily grind no longer dictates our course of action, many of us encounter an existential void. The familiar landmarks of career advancement and social status – those reliable compasses that once guided our daily decisions – suddenly lose their magnetic pull. I’ve witnessed countless individuals cling to their professional roles long past the need for income, seeking to preserve the sense of importance their positions provide. Without work as an anchor, they feel adrift, questioning their value and contribution to the world.
When Purpose Fades
Sometimes the lack of purpose shows up in subtle ways – drifting aimlessly through our days, binge-watching series after series on Netflix while letting creative projects gather dust. We tell ourselves “I’ll start tomorrow” as weeks blur into months. Our phones become both escape and prison, endless scrolling replacing meaningful engagement with the world around us.
Other times, the absence of purpose manifests more profoundly. Depression creeps in like a heavy fog, making even simple tasks feel insurmountable. We might sleep until noon, not because we’re tired, but because we can’t find a compelling reason to get up. The question “What’s the point of it all?” becomes a constant companion, weighing on our shoulders.
Finding Your North Star
So how do we discover our life’s purpose? While there are complex frameworks and methodologies out there, I’d like to offer a simpler approach. Like many profound things in life, finding purpose is both an art and a science. Beginning with the end in mind illuminates the path forward – without a clear destination, every road looks equally uncertain.
Instead, let’s focus on two fundamental questions:
- Which community are you serving?
- How are their lives better because of you?
To make this more tangible, let me share my own journey:
I want to be remembered as someone who helped people break free from their rat race and discover an intentional and fulfilling life. When I imagine the end of my journey, I hear people saying, “Linda, you helped me create a fulfilling and balanced life. Thank you!”
The community I serve extends beyond my immediate circle of friends and family to include my coaching/mentoring clients and the readers who connect with my books and blogs. Thanks to this work, my hope is that their lives are better because they’ve awakened to the possibility of a fulfilling life – both for their present and future. They’ve not only envisioned this life but built it and are living it. Lovely!
Let me illustrate this further with one of my client’s experiences.
Laila came to me seeking to become a more effective leader at work. Our first task together was unearthing her life purpose. You see, our purpose is like a dormant jewel within us – we simply need to mine it, polish it, and carry it forward. When asked about her purpose, here’s how she responded in summary:
“Which community are you serving?”
“My team,” she said initially.
“How are their lives better because of you?”
“Through my empowering leadership, I help them grow confident in their careers.”
Like many, Laila’s first instinct was to frame her impact solely through the lens of work – a natural response in a society where we so often equate our worth with our professional contributions. But I wanted her to think broader.
“How about people outside your team?” I prompted.
Her eyes lit up with recognition. “Yes, of course! Anyone I encounter in different social settings – my niece, my circle of friends – I want to support them all in their growth.”
Through this exploration, Laila’s purpose crystallized into something far more impactful:
Community: People from all walks of life
Impact: Helping others build confidence and realize their full potential
Laila’s life purpose statement: “I help others build confidence and realize their full potential.”
This revelation transformed her understanding of her own value, extending far beyond the boundaries of her professional role.
Your Turn to Discover
When you define your purpose with clarity, something magical happens. The fog of self-doubt begins to lift, replaced by moments of deep connection and satisfaction. You’ll find yourself moving through life with a deeper sense of direction and meaning. I know it might sound like a bold promise – but I’ve lived this transformation myself, and I’ve witnessed it in countless others.
Just as my friend’s journey began under the stars atop Thailand’s tallest peak, your own path to purpose awaits. Your unique gift to the world, like a precious gem, lies ready to be discovered. Now is the perfect time to start digging! 😉
