The human mind is a remarkable thing. It evolved to be powerful enough to rule this planet and may even conquer the universe, yet it can also lead us to destroy each other and our world. Right now, as the world’s most weaponised dictate our future, this is where my sense of injustice sits heaviest. 

In my coaching, I speak often about core values—not just the ones we hold, but the ones we actually live by. There’s a difference. Think of your wardrobe for a moment. Some clothes become our go-to pieces, the ones we reach for without thinking. Others we wear occasionally for the ‘right’ occasions. And then there are those beautiful items we thought we’d wear all the time, yet they hang there, unworn, no matter how much we wish they suited us. 

Values work the same way. The ones you wear most often become your everyday reality, the ones you return to when in doubt—these are your Core Values. Then there are those you admire deeply, the ones that look beautiful on others but somehow don’t quite fit who you are. 

Justice is one of those values for me. I have always admired people who can dedicate their lives to it, who wake up each day and pour themselves into the fight for what’s right. My heart aches at the current state of world affairs—powerful yet misguided individuals wreaking havoc, killing and ruining so many lives, while the world expresses anger and sympathy but offers little else. Like me, democratic nations seem upset and disturbed, yet we watch as the powerful squander our future and our children’s future. 

Last night, I found myself watching world leaders speak at the UN against perpetrators of injustice for over an hour, getting emotional late into the night. Why was I doing this? Then it hit me: I wanted to be heard. My heartache needed to be recognised through those leaders who had the floor and could speak on my behalf. 

Then this morning, as I reflected on my recent pattern of seeking better news, more justice, or simply people who speak about justice, something shifted. I found an insight that might help you if you too are suffering from the current state of affairs and especially that helpless feeling you cannot shake off. 

The Consolation in Accepting What You’re Not 

Justice, while important to me and crucial for the world order, isn’t my core value. For years, I’ve carried guilt about this. Shouldn’t I be doing more? Shouldn’t I be more like those activists I admire? Shouldn’t this pain I feel translate into dedicated action? 

But here’s what I’ve learned: trying to live by values that aren’t your utmost values—the ones that truly make you who you are—is deeply disheartening. When you spend your time, as I have been lately, measuring yourself against someone else’s core values, you end up frustrated, feeling guilty, and unable to contribute anything meaningful. 

Consider this: strategic thinking is important. The ability to see things through matters. Detail orientation and visionary thinking are valuable too. All of these qualities help us succeed in this world, and I’m not denying their importance in our professional work. But we’re not naturally good at all of them, are we? The same is true for values. Justice, along with so many other values, makes this world a better place. But some values are simply better suited for our unique being and our particular contribution to the world. 

When I stopped beating myself up for not embodying every crucial value in existence, I could finally ask a different question: What are my core values, and how might they allow me to contribute to a better world in my own way? 

Finding What Actually Fits 

My core values—the ones I actually “wear” daily—centre around agency, growth, and connection. Agency, or freedom and independence as I sometimes call it, means actively choosing what feels good and right for me. It’s about having clarity to make my own decisions rather than living by default or drifting through obligation. 

And here’s the consolation I found: this is exactly what I embody in my daily interactions, including my coaching work. I help people establish their own agency, build their vision, create productivity plans, and find clarity in their direction—essentially, the ability to choose deliberately rather than drift. I actively pursue my own growth while supporting others in theirs. My coaching profession fits perfectly with who I actually am, not who I think I should be. 

When I look at it this way, I realise I am contributing to something larger. The world doesn’t need everyone to be justice activists. Perhaps it needs each of us operating from our genuine strengths and values. When I help someone gain clarity about their direction and the agency to pursue it, maybe that matters too—just not in the way I thought I “should” matter. 

Perhaps the people I work with will be the ones who dedicate themselves to justice. Perhaps they’ll create businesses that treat people fairly, or raise children who stand up against injustice, or simply live with more integrity and intention. I don’t know. But helping people find their own agency feels like something real, something I can offer authentically. 

What Living Your Values Actually Looks Like 

There’s a particular quality that emerges when you’re operating within your authentic values rather than borrowed ones. I’ve noticed that when I’m aligned with my true core values, my energy sustains me rather than depletes me. My contribution feels natural rather than forced. My impact is consistent rather than sporadic. I show up as myself rather than who I think I should be. 

The world needs people fighting directly for justice—absolutely. But it also needs people helping others find clarity, create meaningful work, build connections, and offer countless other contributions. Maybe systemic change requires this diversity of roles and approaches, with each person contributing from their authentic strengths rather than everyone attempting the same thing. 

Moving Forward with Your Own Values 

So what do I do with my heartache about injustice? I don’t ignore it or numb it. I acknowledge it as part of being human and engaged with the world. I bear witness—which feels important even when it’s not enough. I vote, I support those whose core value is justice, and I stay informed. 

And I keep doing what I’m naturally built for: helping people discover agency in their own lives. Not because it’s the most important work or the most heroic work, but because it’s mine to do. 

A world where more people are living with intention and agency rather than drifting through obligation and guilt—maybe that’s a world moving somewhere better. 

I’m sitting with this question: Am I contributing what I’m actually able to contribute, fully and authentically? 

Maybe your core values are simply pointing you toward your particular way of mattering. 

What are the values you actually “wear” every day? And what might they be quietly showing you about your own way of contributing?